World Jump Day

October 31, 2005 at 7:32 am (Environment, Random)

Apparently this is serious. There is a movement afoot to curb global warming, not by altering our energy consumption patterns, but by altering the earth’s orbit. How to accomplish such a monumental task? By getting about 600 million people in the western hemisphere to jump at the same time. No kidding, there are graphs and everything, so it must be legit. I urge everyone to participate in what could be the most significant event in human history. Only 37 weeks until the big day!

But man I hope these scientists are right. I think there was an episode of Star Trek kind of like this once, but the guy was off in his calculations slightly and disaster ensued (I think Geordi eventually saved the day). What if one too many people jump, or they forget to factor in the morbid obesity rate of American civilazation, and earth goes careening into the sun? Things would probably only get a lot hotter in that case.



  1. booyah said,

    I remember a few years back, when the Weekley World News reported that the Chinese were planning to have their entire population jump at once as their very own WMD. Fortunately, the efforts of 4 billion chinese were counteracted by the vehement jumping of some bar-room patriots somewhere in the midwest. God bless america.

  2. rock creek rambler said,

    These people could have a better effect by jumping off of a tall building, thinning out the population a little.

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